Don’t look for me on Facebook anymore. I deleted my accounts. While Twitter won’t allow Trump to profess lies, apparently Zuckerberg made some sort of deal with him that appears highly questionable. I cannot do much about Trump except cast a vote. But maybe I can do more? I can refuse to be part of Facebook. This is just me being in integrity with myself.
So I deleted my accounts.
Aside from that, yes don’t we all know it! This year, so far, has challenged us to remain present in each moment. This is difficult for me as I’m sure it is for many at this time.
My heart breaks for those who feel fearful and oppressed – my soul remembers these feelings.
Does this recent police killing take our mind off the health concerns with the pandemic? Or does it add to the turmoil in the mind?
We should all be walking with protesters like some police officers are . . . oh how the protests and rioting take me back to the 60’s!
There are many questionable, highly suspicious, happenings these days. But that’s always the case in one way or another. The least we can do is follow our conscious and stay in integrity with ourselves and at least in spirit walk alongside the peaceful protesters.
I wonder how all of this appears from the view of the International Space Station?
I think to my self: be peaceful as you can be within our own mind and heart at all times. This, I feel challenged to do – to be present in this chaos especially when you feel it overwhelmingly encompass you, mind/body and soul, and it makes your heart begin to cry for the confusion, fear, and suffering that are such a part of our nation and our world right now.
I think of the Blessed Mother of my Catholic heritage at this time and to Kuan Yin.
May we turn to hearts and minds Kuan Yin, the embodiment of compassion at this time, and remain in integrity with our greater, wiser selves. May the prayer above from the Sravasti Abbey be helpful to you at this time ( as it was for me).
Patterns. Where does one start? They’re everywhere it seems–these life patterns! Astro Study and Dharma Study are both clear about them. I’ve studied them through the dharma talks given by eastern teachers but noticed them long before any formal studies. And the astrological study, you know planetary movements, has also supported my observations about patterns too–the same planet in the same place as it moves around the zodiac. Luminary Moon hits the same digs every month and the Sun every year and so on; each planet moving at different speeds but as they aspect one another, they tend to produce the same type of event or experience. The Facebook “On This Day” Memories application submits to you a list of all posts you made on that day and includes re-posts from that day in previous years. Patterns are clearly there from my very own posts blatantly screaming back at me, “Notice!”
Patterns! A head cold or medical issue repeating the same time each year, moving during the same month (sometimes to the day) in certain years–it goes on ad nauseum: neighbor issue, financial concern, trips with family, even weather systems which have not to do with my own personality.
What are these anyway? I’ve come to some thoughts to put down for myself and you too if you are still reading this. Karma! But hold on buster–not in the way most people think of the word. It’s only a word that means “action” and is a result of “causes and conditions”, some of which are not personal.
Better not to complicate this bit of writing (which I don’t intend to go on much longer here); therefore, best not to get into an explanation of the non-self. So, just sticking to the causes and conditions bit, accumulated energy will tend to repeat at times when conditions support it to do so.
Why does it repeat? I’m going to narrow it down to the undesirable parts–those parts about the personality that makes me cringe to think about them. Those patterns–that’s where this post is headed. There a good patterns too which we are creating in each and every moment actually, but . . .
Focusing further on the patterns such as anger at certain things or we could use a nicer word: aversions. I don’t want to deal with those anymore but causes and conditions accumulate to store those patterns, those aversions and surprisingly there are times they find their way to the surface from deep down in groundconsciousness.
It seems that past conditions have caused me to react with aversion and it has become a habit, a pattern that has been repeated And it’s not been until my later years here (late bloomer), that there’s not even been a conscious connection.
Now I see the pattern or one could say there is now a ‘me’ who is aware of them and with that awareness comes the observer–this creating distance between the aversion and the awareness. Sometimes reactions still happen; yet, with the newly awakened awareness of the pattern which has become gradually more conscious over many years, those reactions are minimal and mostly internally worked out. This decreases any future punch that they may hold.
How to proceed? Its a matter of creating new causes and conditions and not taking the old karma personal. When the aversion arises, one can realize that it comes from prior reactions that have been stored — maybe not even from the current lifetime. Who knows? Anyway, its what this person (personality named Joy) has to deal with, but it isn’t me and isn’t personal and it does not really come from “now”–it arises from past causes and conditions (karma), remember?
What of it? The idea is to begin to create new causes and conditions, stronger than the old perhaps and certainly more imbued with love, joy, compassion, patience and the numerous good qualities and virtues we desire to embrace which increase our happiness and peace. New actions, new karma! And also the goal is to have compassion for the personality self. And by doing this we achieve the desire remain awake for the benefit of all others as well as the self here.
That which recognizes the pattern of aversion or even responds to the aversion has no aversion.
How to remain awake? Here we go! Back on the bandwagon about meditation. And meditation simply means being aware of what is going on inside one’s own head and heart. Not getting carried away by fantasy or letting thoughts drag you all over the darn place!
I do write newslettersfrequently that include a lot of information regarding awareness and meditation since it’s a huge part of psychic development.
There. We’re at the end of the post and worked it out for us maybe. Yes? Well, no matter (pun intended)–gave it a whirl and gave the self a talking to at the same time.
Warning: mostly boring stuff. This is a journal entry that I started on Facebook and it started to get too long so I finished it here. I picked up a few documentaries at the video store the other day–one was on hiking Kilimanjaro. And the other entitled “When we left the earth” about the space program, NASA and the astronauts. Found both very enjoyable and no problem to ease into watching after leaving the gym today. The last 10 minutes on the treadmill required mental discipline to get through but even though it’s Friday, I didn’t accept any excuse from the weak mind that kept offering excuses to quit prematurely.
They were giving away free T-shirts so picked up a few for myself, daughter and granddaughter; so soft and a nice little treat.
The last of the pottery Xmas gifts are being fired and tomorrow I will finish one of the last ones. Hope to go the movies later to see Hunger Games with some of the family and aside from that, just waiting for news about an upcoming move to my own apartment.
This little place which is like a little house of it’s own has a front and back porch for my plants and steps up with a railing–not many; maybe 6 or 7. The whole apartment area which is more like small little houses is really surrounded by woods and a creek is nearby or so I’m told—its a gem to find a place surrounded by woods here in the city. Another bonus is that it’s not far from family and even closer to the gym than where I reside now.
Yeah, so I’ve been renting a few movies which help to keep my mind away from wanting to attach … well, you know this saying, right? My Dad used it all the time, “Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched”, he’d say to me. Evidently, Dad (rest is soul) noticed the tendency toward disappointment in me at an early age. It’s taken all these many years to finally integrate that message of non-attachment.
The other day I was listening to a Buddhist teacher who said when you begin the path of awareness and mindfulness that you sometimes do a lot of karmic clearing all at once. This brought a moment of consolation for the difficulties that I’ve experienced integrating here from my hermit lifestyle in the woods. The Winter Solstice before even considering a move (or having the foggiest hint that I’d be doing so) I remember standing up on the mountain ridge behind my house hanging i-Ching and Buddha coins on a sweet little naturally growing live white pine tree which I assigned as my personal yule tree. I clearly recall that I asked for more knowledge about Buddhism and “to become more Buddha-like”. Yep, that could have done it! LOL I’m not kidding –really, I’m not. I was quiet serious about expanding knowledge about Buddhism at the time. And actually, not long after that (there being no sanghas in those old mountains, I learned about Vajra TV which I considered to be a miracle!)
And now that I’ve left the mountains, I will be happy to be once again in my own little nest. (I’m sharing an apartment with my sister and niece–add that one to the challenges faced since moving here.) Anyway, when the move happens (and it will eventually!), I plan to eat better, cook healthier food.
You know… I look back over my life for the past… well, since the summer of 2012 (and we’re soon to be in 2015 in a few weeks) and realize even more so now how this “heap-load of intense karmic clearing” could really be a viable or possible truth.
I hope not to have incurred further or additional karma these past few years, but if intention is part of the cause/effect karmic equation for the future, this may ease any future karmic consequence.
One can only hope for the best on a karmic level and to offset that to perform good deeds, so tonglen meditations, and as they say accrue merit to create good karma to balance.
Anyway, I can correlate so many Buddhist teachings with my experiences over the past 2+ years and while I may have struggled a good deal with reality/life, many realizations have occurred. And this is one more thing to be grateful for.
My daughters have their apartments all decorated for the holidays now. I hope for them that they experience that time goes slowly so that they can enjoy their Christmas trees and bright things each day.
In contrast, and as for me as I’ve grow older, it seems that holidays come and go so fast that it’s hardly worth the effort to drag the decorating stuff out before you have to put it back again. I gave my holiday decorations to my girls for that and various reasons.
I know that I will be releasing even more items/things/stuff, giving more away since the new apartment will be even smaller than the old one that I had here.
Anyway, speaking of releasing, somehow I lost a few pounds recently and this time I hope to keep that going! I think I owe a thank you to the treadmill. 🙂 I am so grateful to be able to go to the gym. I want to get back into swimming soon too–all these big plans. LOL
Letting things go… materially, emotionally and mentally! And as Shakespeare wrote, “All’s well that ends well” and yet it is still debated if that play was a comedy or tragedy. Perhaps, like all of our lives, both.
PS– oh, and that apartment house I mentioned… it’s an 11 (numerology). But then there I go again; you’re right about those chickens Dad. Yeah, I’m psychic and my intuition tells me things but it’s still better to take Dad’s advice.