Is it possible that any moment in our life would be one that we would wish to have unchanging, remaining the same for eternity? We do this with life maybe subconsciously but we seem to continually be leaning forward to try to achieve that unchanging and happy moment. Here are some thoughts about that from my view. My life does not seem to be one unchanging moment of happiness. That’s likely true for you too, right? No matter how we try consciously (or subconsciously) to achieve a continually unending moment of bliss, we know it’s not possible. Yet we still try for it.
What to do then? We can pull back from striving to reach for that unending happy moment and instead make peace with this here moment no matter how it appears for us. How? By believing that this moment is more than enough. Its not that difficult really. We can do it by developing stability and the state of wellbeing with intentionality. ( Fake it until you make it using the tool of meditation. ) This then is the gateway to freedom from the suffering that consumes us due to yearning for some other moment (s).
It is to our great benefit to have the kind of confidence in our overall life that any moment has, contained within it, the seed of freedom from the suffering that yearning creates – said another way, enlightenment comes from making peace with the human condition.
When we don’t argue with the way things ‘are’ and when we don’t make life wrong by believing like . . . “it shouldn’t be this way” . . . and when we can make peace with life in such a way that we do not become tired of life or weary of the trials that are natural to this dimensional reality.
Let’s face it. Life does turn sour on occasion or as I have heard it recently referred, “. . . when life turns rancid.” But what I am referring to here is that to make peace with life and its many ups, downs, and experiences keeps us out of that kind of yearning that causes our unhappiness.
Psychologists tell us that even if we intellectually admit that difficulties in life happen and we concede that trauma does occur in life, when we bump up against such energy there’s a part of the mind that is incredulous–its doubtful about it’s happening. And in that type of unacceptance, we suffer even more. In Buddhist thought, this is referred to as ‘the second arrow’ if you are familiar. Double suffering is another way to say that. There’s a part of the mind that cannot conceive that suffering can occur in our life! And want’s to deny that it shouldn’t be the way it is.
We set ourselves up when we try to reach out to find that which we believe will complete or fulfill our hearts.
The fact that we think our heart is lacking that which something outside ourselves can provide is the first step in the confusion about all this.
Whatever we reach out for in order to bring the heart to its fulfillment it (or to complete it) will eventually disappoint us. Clinging or grasping for what we think we don’t already have can never work in the end.
Imperfection, disappointment, anger, even hatred energies exist in this realm and are woven into the fact of being human. It’s just how things are on earth. Yet, remember, as you just read that last sentence, there was likely that part of your mind that disbelieves it. Or believes those energies bump into others but not myself.
Stress occurs by not making peace with that way things are and resisting or arguing with it all. I often quote this phrase, “Whenever you argue with life, you lose.” Meaning you suffer.
My final thought: All difficulties or suffering bring opportunities for growth and insight. When we understand life in the ways I’ve written about here, we develop wisdom. Then the mind feels strength, energy, freedom, detachment and becomes devoid of craving and the sources or causes of suffering.